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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28375470">dust to dust</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravynwytch/pseuds/ravynwytch'>ravynwytch</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Old Guard (Movie 2020), Trust (TV 2018)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Daemons, Alternate Universe - His Dark Materials Fusion, Angst, Blood and Violence, Bottom Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani, Bottom Nicky | Nicolò di Genova, Canon-Typical Violence, Daemon Touching, Drug Use, Excessive Drinking, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Harm to Daemons, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Jumps around in the timelines, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, More tags to be added in the future, Multi, Non Consensual Daemon Touching, Non-Linear Narrative, Past Child Abuse, References to Drugs, Top Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani, Top Nicky | Nicolò di Genova</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-11 00:08:49</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,623</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28375470</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravynwytch/pseuds/ravynwytch</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>A dæmon is the physical manifestation of one's soul. A constant companion from birth till death.</p><p>[Alternating chapters between Trust and The Old Guard taking place in alternate universes where dæmons exist]</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Andy | Andromache of Scythia/Quynh | Noriko, Booker | Sebastien le Livre/Nile Freeman, Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova, Leonardo/Primo Nizzuto, Leonardo/Regina (Trust)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>33</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. the exchange - primo & little paul</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Oh hey, another self-indulgent fic? Don't mind if I do.</p><p>As with my other one, this will alternate between both fandoms from one chapter to the next. It will also, like my other, jump around in time.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em> <b>1973</b> </em>
</p><p>The arrival of a secondary car was unexpected. Little Paul shifted nervously as the car came to a halt, as he heard a door slam. Why was no one talking? He wanted to stoop down, seek out Ivy, sink his fingers into her brown fur but he knew moving wasn’t an option right now with whatever was going on. At the moment, seeking comfort from his dæmon and offering her comfort in turn was impossible.</p><p>When the silence was finally broken, it was by a voice he didn’t recognize. Didn’t even understand what this new arrival and Berto were saying—his Italian left much to be desired despite how much of his life he’d spent in the country. The man’s accent didn’t help either. It was obvious he wasn’t from Rome. Little Paul suspected that the Roman dialect was for Berto’s sake.</p><p>A shadow fell over him then, cutting out the bit of light the burlap sack over his head allowed in. His eyes darted about around the man whom he didn’t recognize once the sack was pulled off. Little Paul couldn’t see a dæmon anywhere near him. Perhaps it was not one of the land but rather of the sky. And yet, when his eyes quickly glanced up towards the blue expanse overhead, he still saw nothing. Where in the world was this man’s dæmon? Everyone had one, it was impossible that he didn’t.</p><p>He tried to get away the moment he realized what was about to go down, told Berto and the man ‘fuck this’ and made to run. A wall of pain smacked into him before he could take more than a singular step, nearly taking him down. Ivy was behind him, shrieking as if she were being murdered. And that’s what it felt like. The pain was so intense that Little Paul barely perceived his body being slammed against the trunk of Berto’s car.</p><p>This wasn’t how things were supposed to go. This wasn’t part of the plan. And, Little Paul had to admit, he was scared.</p><p>His eyes were wild as he sought out Ivy. The rabbit was writhing on the ground, a snake wrapped around her tiny frame. The dæmon, the man’s dæmon. That was it. Where had it come from? How had it managed to slip by Ivy’s notice? Had it hidden under Berto’s car when the man emerged from his own, waiting to strike, knowing that Paul wouldn’t go so easily?</p><p>The man was saying something to him but Little Paul didn’t register it, too distracted by the pain lancing through his body, and Ivy’s screams, to hear. What he did pick up was the man letting out a sharp, quick whistle and then the pain ebbing away as the snake unfurled itself from around Ivy. Paul wanted to fall to his knees, to crawl over to his dæmon and hold her. They both needed it yet neither moved, not wanting to incur the man and his vicious dæmon’s wrath for a second time.</p><p>He pays no mind to the other and Berto, his attention completely on Ivy and the snake dæmon that is slithering away from her. It climbs up Berto’s car, slides across the hot metal. Its scales appear black but Paul notices that they shimmer blue in the light. Despite the fear inside him, he can’t help but admit that the snake is beautiful. Beautiful and deadly. It continues on its path until it is mere inches from Paul’s face, it’s piercing blue eyes watching him carefully, looking ready to strike at him if he tries anything.</p><p>He wracks his brain for what type of snake it is, taking in the keeled scales of the creature. Soon enough his mind lands on bush viper. Atheris squamigera to be exact. It’s sudden tapered off tail tells Little Paul that the snake is male.</p><p>Berto’s voice gets more heated and Paul looks up to watch the exchange, the viper just on the edge of his vision. He feels Ivy press into his leg, seeking comfort and safety. His hands are tied behind his back now courtesy of the mystery man, rendering him unable to properly give her and himself what they both so desperately need.</p><p>The viper dæmon only moves when Berto tells the man in cornflower blue to step away. It moves swiftly, climbing over the roof and to the hood where it winds around its human’s arm and upwards to drape itself around his neck.</p><p>And suddenly Berto and his companion are getting into the car and driving off, leaving Little Paul alone with the man, his dæmon, and his crimson vehicle that morbidly reminds the teen of blood. He had no idea what to expect next but seeing the other pull a rifle out of his trunk was certainly nowhere in the realm of what he thought might come.</p><p>The man climbs onto the roof of the car, gun in hand, and the snake descends the man’s body, resting atop the roof as its human lines up a shot. It takes two to send the car veering off into the field of sunflowers.</p><p>When the man climbs down, it’s the first time Paul gets to see him properly. He’s older than him, maybe early thirties, and despite the situation, the teen has to admit that the man is handsome. Thick dark hair, eyes that seem to shift from green to blue depending on how the light hits them, a strong jawline, broad shoulders. He and his dæmon make quite the pair—easy on the eyes. And if Paul wasn’t in this situation right now he might admire the other’s looks more but as it stands, the man scares the shit out of him which dampens his ability to truly appreciate his beauty.</p><p>Little Paul soon learns, as he follows his legitimate captor towards where Berto’s car crashed, that the first bullet hadn’t missed. It had been used to wound the heavyset man. The second had killed the driver. By the slump of the body and the blood spatter on the windshield, it’s clear that the bullet had traveled through the skull.</p><p>Once more the snake leaves its human, slithering to the ground as they approach Berto who had exited the car moments before they arrived, his face and shoulder—where the first shot went through—blooded up. And Paul remembers something else about bush vipers. They are ambush predators. Stick their prey with venom, let them scramble away and find them later. That’s what this reminds him of.</p><p>He stands back, takes in the man and viper as they move in such perfect sync, both pure predator, as they close in on their respective prey. Human and dæmon.</p><p>“Primo, per favore,” Berto gasps out.</p><p>“Elio, per favore,” Berto’s dæmon—a brown rat named Gioia—begs.</p><p>Primo and Elio. Those are the names of the mystery man and his dæmon. At least Little Paul won’t have to continue to think of them in terms of titles and species anymore.</p><p>Elio strikes at Gioia in the same instance that Primo puts the rope, that had previously been used to tie up Paul’s wrists, around Berto’s neck. Paul is horrified at the sight of both human and dæmon struggling. Elio punctures the rat’s neck with his fangs, surely injecting venom into the tiny body.</p><p>“Paul,” Ivy whimpers at his feet. He can’t watch this and neither can she. It’s horrible. It’s <em>sick</em>. And Primo’s eyes won’t leave his own, like he’s asserting dominance over Paul. Like he’s telling him ‘this could be you’.</p><p>Little Paul takes Ivy and runs before he can witness Berto and Gioia’s demise. This wasn’t part of the plan. Nobody was supposed to die. Nobody else was meant to get involved.</p><hr/><p>Primo and Elio watch the hippie and his rabbit dart away. Primo looks down at Berto, seeing the man has stopped struggling, eyes rolled up into his head. His dæmon evaporates into particles of light, disappearing from the world, confirming Berto’s death.</p><p>The viper laughs from his place on the ground, eyes still trained in the direction the other two ran off in. “Run little rabbits, run.” His voice rumbles in his throat, a slight hiss at the end of each syllable.</p><p>Primo snatches up the rifle from where he’s rested it on the boot of Berto’s car. “Andiamo.”</p><p>Elio returns to Primo, climbing the length of the human’s body before settling about his neck once more. It’s the usual spot that the snake takes up when he and Primo are on foot. It’s much more convenient than slithering about after his human. For all of Elio’s speed, following after somebody is rather tedious and slow and, well, humans can travel longer distances in a shorter amount of time than a snake can.</p><p>It’s obvious where the teen and his dæmon will end up. His blind running through the field of sunflowers is erratic but he’s aiming for the dirt road that they drove down just minutes ago. Primo and Elio make their way through the field, leaving behind Berto and the driver. Primo will need help moving the bodies so they can be disposed of once they return to Calabria.</p><p>They beat the kid to the road. They can hear him somewhere off in the distance, getting closer. Primo settles down and lights a cigarette, the gun resting across his lap. Elio wastes the time away slithering over the gun and Primo’s arm—the one not in possession of the hand that’s holding the cigarette.</p><p>When the hippie emerges from the field, it’s with a tumble that nearly makes him land on his own dæmon. But she’s pressed safely to his chest, his hands clutching her to him so tight as if Primo or Elio might rip her away from him. Can’t really blame the kid given Elio’s assault from before. But Primo won’t touch the dæmon. He’s never touched another’s dæmon besides Leonardo’s and Regina’s.</p><p>But Elio has been touched by other’s. The couple—with kindness and love—as well as Salvatore and Primo’s father—with hatred and the intent to inflict pain onto Primo. The amount of times his human’s father especially had grabbed at the viper still makes the dæmon shake with rage and fear even to this day. And the man has been dead twenty years.</p><p>The dæmon remembers each and every time with horrifying vividness. And it was not so much the pain he himself felt at being handled by another that troubled him, it was watching his human scream and writhe in the most intense pain a human could feel. And if Elio tried to fight back, if he had changed shape into something big and mean before he had settled, Primo would get beaten instead. It was the same even after he had settled into this form.</p><p>His venom could have killed Primo’s father, Elio had been tempted several times to end the man and his own dæmon’s lives. Perhaps he would have if the bastard hadn’t gotten himself killed in the process of committing a crime. Both Primo and Elio hoped the fuck had died slowly. It’s the only thing he ever deserved.</p><p>They get Little Paul to assist with moving the bodies. It’s a long and arduous process hauling both Berto and the driver from within the field to Primo’s car in the road but they manage it.</p><p>Primo forces the teen and his dæmon into the trunk with Berto. Elio finds the expression on the boy’s face as he climbs in to be darkly humorous.</p><p>With the Getty boy nice and comfortable in there, the two climb back into the car. What lies ahead is a five hour car ride to Calabria and the drive is never fun but at least they have each other to talk to and an impressive amount of cassette tapes to keep the music from going stale.</p><p>There’s everything from Rock to Classical to Jazz to Opera and so on. Primo and Elio’s musical tastes vary as widely as their taste in books. Speaking of which, there’s a small duffel bag full of those under the passenger seat. Never know when you’ll be stuck in a car for hours with nothing to do so it’s best to be prepared.</p><p>Elio drapes himself across the upper dash, soaking in the sunlight that penetrates the windshield, as Primo starts the engine. And then they’re off, leaving the crashed car and the field of sunflowers behind.</p><p>If all goes well, they’ll be swimming in cash by the end of this whole affair. Getty will pay for his grandson one way or another.</p><p>They always pay in the end.</p><hr/><p>In the trunk, Paul and Ivy are pressed together, attempting to ignore Berto’s body. They’re doing their best not to think about how his dæmon is gone, reduced to nothingness like it had never existed in the first place.</p><p>He fucked up. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go. His fake kidnapping was never meant to become real. Why had Berto done this? Had he hated Paul that much for not paying?</p><p>He doesn’t want to think what that man, Primo, and his dæmon will do to them if they don’t get what they want. The duo had ended four lives like it was nothing. And God, it wasn’t to them, that much was apparent. How many others have they killed?</p><p>Fuck, he’s probably going to die too. Ivy is probably going to die and it’s going to be all his fault.</p><p>Little Paul wants his mother.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Translation of the Italian:<br/>Per favore = Please<br/>Andiamo = Let's go</p><p>Dæmons introduced in this chapter:<br/>Ivy = Little Paul's dæmon. Eastern Cottontail Rabbit. Red-brown coloration. Female. Name meaning: N/A (simply comes from the plant)<br/>Elio = Primo's dæmon. Bush Viper, specifically a Atheris squamigera. Midnight blue coloration (appears black but scales shimmer blue in the sun). Male. Name meaning: Sun-God/Sun/Sunlight/Sunshine (derived from the sun god Helios)<br/>Gioia = Berto's dæmon. Brown Rat. Female. Name meaning: Joy</p><p>I did so much research on bush vipers it's not even funny. Also special shout-out to my fiancee who helped as well because she went to college to study animals and is really knowledgeable and amazing with this stuff.</p><p>I hope you enjoyed this! Not every chapter will be a re-write of a scene from the canons of the two medias. In fact, most won't be and if there is a re-write, it'll only be a section of the chapter going forward.</p><p>Thanks for reading!</p><p>You can come talk to me or send me writing prompts on my blog: <a href="http://ravynwytch.tumblr.com">here</a></p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. first touch - nicky & joe</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>
    <b>1102</b>
  </em>
</p><p>They’re three years out and hundreds of miles from the battlefield in which they met. In which they killed each other time and again, both bewildered as to why the other would not simply stay dead. Why neither one’s dæmon evaporated into the wind but remained by their side, seemingly as stone dead as their human.</p><p>Not Yusuf nor Nicolò have the answers as to why either of them were chosen to receive such a gift as immortality. But once they had come to realize that no matter how many times they ended the other’s life that they would continue to draw breath, they had taken up traveling together.</p><p>Yusuf was the one to extend the olive branch to Nicolò whom had accepted it somewhat begrudgingly. It was not that he was an unkind man but he had been raised with certain views—much as Yusuf had. But whereas Yusuf was previously a merchant which had allowed him to interact with people from all walks of life who worshiped in all manner of ways, Nicolò had been rather sheltered. Son of a noble, only ever engaging with those in his social class, and then a priest, who mainly communicated with others of the cloth.</p><p>Both had their prejudices but Nicolò had more to work through than Yusuf.</p><p>It had taken a year for him to fully come around to Islam, to learn it was not a religion of evil as he had been taught. And then it was another three months after that before he apologized profusely to Yusuf for what his people had done to his fellow Muslims. He had even spoken in Arabic to show how much he meant it too. A language in which he had not known a lick of until they deserted.</p><p>Though, to be fair, Yusuf hadn’t known Ligurian either. They had had to communicate and teach each other their languages by speaking in some bastardization of Latin and Greek interspersed with their mother tongues.</p><p>Two years into their travels they had become much more friendly towards one another as had their dæmons. Often the creatures would hold their own conversations. It was a testament to how far they’d come, how much they had changed from those men who had been locked in combat only a short time ago.</p><p>And now here they are, on the border of Turkey, taking up residence in some damp little cave because they lack the funds to rent a room at an inn. Once they crossed over into the country they would seek out temporary employment to refill their coin purses. As it stands, they have barely enough for even a single loaf of bread.</p><p>They still have half a quarter of a loaf in their pack but that’s all. Not a single crumb more. Their meager amount of food forced Nicolò and his dæmon—a raven named Valerio—to leave the cave with a bow and a sheaf of arrows to hunt for dinner.</p><p>Yusuf had offered to go instead but Nicolò had insisted, pointing out that Valerio could take to the sky and track down targets, to then report their location to the Genovian, with ease. He also pointed out that he’s a better shot and that was fair. He <em>is</em> the finer archer of the two though Yusuf is the more skilled swordsman.</p><p>Both men have their strengths and weaknesses. Each compliments the other in a way that puts them in perfect harmony with one another.</p><p>So Yusuf waits in the cave with his own dæmon—an African wild dog named Atheer.</p><p>The dog is stationed by the mouth of the cave, pacing back and forth whilst his human gets a fire going. All is calm though Yusuf hopes that Nicolò and Valerio will soon return. Storm clouds are beginning to gather in the distance, threatening sheets of rain and strikes of lightning.</p><p>“They have been gone far too long,” Atheer says, stopping in his tracks and hunching his shoulders.</p><p>“Yes, but I am certain they will be arriving any moment now.”</p><p>“I do not hear them. Should we not go looking for them?”</p><p>“Nicolò and Valerio are perfectly capable of caring for themselves.”</p><p>“Of course,” Atheer says, sounding mildly offended that Yusuf would even seemingly insinuate that he thought less of the duo. “But I am worried.”</p><p>“We will wait awhile longer and if they do not appear soon, we will set out and look for them,” Yusuf promises.</p><p>Atheer nods and turns his gaze outwards again, vision dancing over the land that lays stretched out before him.</p><p>Yusuf cannot begrudge Atheer his worry. He feels much the same though he knows he should not. Nicolò is a fierce warrior, he is resourceful and intelligent. And immortal. Besides, nothing could possibly have gone wrong on such a simple hunt.</p><p>In the past he would not have worried in such a way but there has been something different between himself and Nicolò as of late.</p><p>An awkward sort of dance has blossomed from their friendship. A brush of fingers here and there, the way they will stand far too close together at times that he can feel the pleasant heat radiating off of the Genovian’s body. Even the casual, everyday touches linger far longer than they should and Yusuf tries not to read too much into it. Nicolò was a priest and even after three years he’s uncertain if the man still takes his vows in regards to romance and sex seriously or not.</p><p>Doesn’t even know if Nicolò has made peace with himself in terms of his preferences. One possessing a same-sex dæmon does not always mean such a thing but it is often more true than not. Raised in the sort of society that he was, Yusuf is positive that Nicolò feels shame if that is the case for him. But he cannot lose himself to such thoughts.</p><p>It could all mean nothing. Just their friendship evolving, becoming more open, and that is all there is to it.</p>
<hr/><p>He knows they’ve been out here far too long. They both do. But Nicolò has much on his mind and a strange part of him wants to provide well for Yusuf and Atheer. He’s doing his best to tamp that down, doesn’t want to ruminate on what that feeling is because he doesn’t know how to go about tackling it. He’s never liked anyone before, not in the way his heart is telling him he does Yusuf.</p><p>It’s exhausting and more than a little scary and it’s all so against God. His dreams are sin enough let alone acting upon them. If the day comes that they do ever meet an eternal rest, he knows he would be sent to the very depths of Hell for seeing that his little, almost nightly, fantasies came to fruition.</p><p>“Nicolò,” Valerio huffs in such a way that tells the human that the dæmon has been trying to get his attention for some time now.</p><p>“Sì?”</p><p>“Si avvicina una tempesta,” the raven says, indicating towards the dark clouds closing in on their location with a tilt of his head.</p><p>Nicolò glances down at what they have bagged so far. Animals can sense an incoming storm and they at once seek shelter from it. Due to that ingrained instinct, the pair have only managed to kill two rather fat rabbits. It is hardly what Nicolò was hoping for but it will do for now. The four of them don’t plan to spend more than the night in the cave anyway.</p><p>“Let us head back then.”</p><p>The dæmon hops off the branch he is perched upon and settles on Nicolò’s right shoulder. “We have kept them waiting awhile now.”</p><p>“We have.”</p><p>“They may be worried about us.”</p><p>“Yusuf and Atheer know we are more than capable of watching out for ourselves.”</p><p>“They care for us,” Valerio points out. “It would not be so strange for them to feel such a way. We are the same when they are gone for too long.”</p><p>Valerio is right. Nicolò has been in a similar situation, had nearly gone out with the raven to find the other two some months ago.</p><p>They had been in Damascus at the time and Yusuf and Atheer had only stepped out to go to the market to pick up a few things. It should not have taken more than ten minutes but as that bled into an hour, Nicolò had begun to pace and Valerio had taken up a position by one of the windows, gazing outside, attempting to spy any sign of the Tunisian and his dæmon. It was ridiculous to think anything had happened. And even if it had, the pair would’ve been fine, but Yusuf was his friend. Concern was normal.</p><p>When finally human and dæmon had reached their wits end, they had made for the door only to then have Yusuf and Atheer step through it and into the cramped abode. Apparently an elderly woman had held Yusuf up by engaging him in a rather long conversation about her granddaughter who had come of marrying age just the week before.</p><p>Nicolò still couldn’t believe how ready he and Valerio were that day to venture onto the streets to seek out the others. It was utterly ridiculous.</p><p>They return to the cave, rabbits clutched in one hand, to find Atheer waiting by the mouth of it. Yusuf is standing about three feet back from his dæmon. Valerio mutters into Nicolò’s ear about being right but he only ignores the raven and continues up the steep incline leading to their temporary shelter.</p><p>The second they step into the safety of the cave, the rain comes pouring down. They look behind themselves in mild surprise and then back towards Yusuf who chuckles.</p><p>“Made it back just in time then,” he says, giving Nicolò a bright smile which the Genovian returns with his own patented barely there one.</p>
<hr/><p>Nicolò apologizes for being gone so long and returning with only the two rabbits but Yusuf shushes him. It’s nothing to feel badly about, he’s only glad the others returned safely and before the storm hit.</p><p>It’s a bad one. Yusuf can’t see a damned thing outside the cave. Atheer squints and tilts his head this way and that and tells his human the same. Yusuf knows there will be some flooding and it’s a good thing that Nicolò and Valerio tracked down the rabbits they did. There’s enough meat on the animals that one is more than enough for all four of them—they’ll save the other for tomorrow as they suspect that they’ll be forced to spend an extra day in the cavern—particularly the other two. Nicolò and Valerio are still so used to eating so little due to their time in the Holy Army where famine was, and still is, commonplace.</p><p>They don’t always do it but sometimes Yusuf and Atheer encourage the others to eat more. The guilty look on Nicolò’s face when he does indulge never fails to make Yusuf’s heart clench. Even Valerio sulks in the corner after finishing a meal that consists of even slightly more food than the typically too small portions that he and his human allow themselves.</p><p>Yusuf knows the reason for the behavior. Neither human nor dæmon can cease thinking on all those they had befriended and fought alongside starving to death. There are still those within the Church’s army dying of starvation. They are shipped out to Jerusalem and made to fend for themselves for the most part, the Church providing them with too little resources for the number of soldiers they send forth into the place that Yusuf had once called home.</p><p>Though Nicolò and Valerio know now that the war is wrong, that <em>they</em> were wrong, it is still difficult not to feel badly for all those needlessly dying due to the Church’s neglect. They have a big heart and Yusuf and Atheer rather adore that about them. Even if their hearts cause them pain, make them feel they don’t deserve to eat well.</p><p>So Yusuf and the dog don’t push, only offer gentle encouragement in the hopes that perhaps Nicolò and his own dæmon will return to more healthy eating habits in the future rather than allowing a gentle hunger to continuously gnaw at their bellies for the rest of time.</p><p>They eat in silence and by the end of their simple meal there’s still enough of the cooked rabbit left over that they can have it for breakfast. Nicolò carefully stores it all away as Yusuf gets their bedrolls set up. Atheer and Valerio are off to one side, having a hushed conversation that ends in Valerio letting out a gentle laugh, Atheer seemingly having said something amusing.</p><p>Their bedrolls are about eight feet apart. Atheer lays by Yusuf’s side whilst Valerio takes up a spot by the mouth of the cave on a piece of wall that juts out, creating a sort of perch that suites the raven just fine.</p><p>The rain lulls them all to sleep and things are peaceful for about half an hour before Nicolò jolts awake, Valerio nearly falling from the wall as he does the same.</p><p>The sound of the Genovian sitting up with a gasp is enough to stir Yusuf and Atheer into wakefulness.</p><p>Nicolò’s harsh breathing tells Yusuf that he’s suffered from another nightmare. It is a common thing for the lot of them. War had sunk its claws into their minds and created scars so gaping that even their immortality cannot mend the multitude of wounds that have been left behind in its wake.</p><p>Before Valerio can reach his human, to offer and seek comfort from the grotesque images that had played out in their heads, Atheer is there.</p><p>Nicolò doesn’t know what, in that moment, possesses him to reach out and place his hand atop Atheer’s head but he does. The dæmon’s fur is soft and the dog leans further into the touch. It’s only when Nicolò hears Yusuf’s breath hitch sharply that he realizes what he’s done and snatches his hand back.</p><p>“Yusuf, ʾanā ʾāsef,” Nicolò apologizes immediately.</p><p>“No, no, it is fine. It did not hurt it was...I do not know how to explain it but it felt...<em>nice</em>.”</p><p>Hesitantly, Nicolò reaches out again, fingers brushing over Atheer’s head, petting the fur down. The dæmon closes his eyes, relishing in the feeling and Yusuf mimics the action, the look on his face one of pure peace.</p><p>Valerio glances between the three of them for a few silent beats before slowly approaching Yusuf. The raven scrapes the ground lightly with its claws, attempting to capture Yusuf’s attention. It works as the Tunisian opens his eyes at the noise and gazes down at the bird. His own hand finds its body, palm resting lightly against the dæmon’s back as his thumb strokes Valerio’s head.</p><p>The feeling that overwhelms Nicolò at the touch is too much for him. It’s true, it <em>does </em>feels nice. And though he’s never before experienced pleasures of the flesh, he knows that the sensation he's experiencing through his link with Valerio now <em>is</em> pleasure. The kind that sends one’s pulse racing.</p><p>Nicolò surges to his feet and backs away rapidly from Atheer. Valerio flings himself away from Yusuf as he senses Nicolò’s distress.</p><p>“Nicolò what…” Yusuf trails off as he takes in the expression on the other man’s face.</p><p>Now, admittedly, the Tunisian himself has never lain with another either but he has also never thought that he must feel guilt for experiencing what he had when Nicolò touched Atheer. Perhaps it was because of all the poetry that Yusuf had consumed over his lifetime. Prose that did not shy away from sex and romance, the sorts of things that would have been forbidden for a priest to read.</p><p>The prudishness of Catholicism, the years spent as a man of the cloth, and the belief that homosexuality is a sin, has all clearly wormed its way deep into Nicolò’s mind, creating such a tight rope of shame that it is akin to a noose.</p><p>But Yusuf won’t allow Nicolò to continue to hate himself for his feelings. He’s no longer a priest, he’s allowed to take what he wants now. And if God hates him for loving other men then that is no god worthy of even an ounce of worship.</p><p>“I should not have done that,” Nicolò whispers low, his voice carrying in the cave, making his words crystal clear to Yusuf’s ears.</p><p>“I would like you to do it again.”</p><p>“Do not say that,” Nicolò demands, face twisting into an expression of mild anger.</p><p>“Nicolò, there is nothing wrong with what you did...or felt.”</p><p>“Yes there is. It is wrong to touch another’s dæmon. And I am not meant to feel <em>that</em> way.”</p><p>“Feel <em>what</em> way?” Yusuf presses. He wants the Genovian to say it.</p><p>“Nothing.” Nicolò shakes his head. “I cannot have it anyway.”</p><p>“You can.”</p><p>“No, I cannot. <em>Stop</em>.” Nicolò turns to walk to the other side of the cave.</p><p>Yusuf climbs to his feet then, hurries over to his companion and grabs his wrist. Nicolò whirls around, ready to demand that the other unhand him but is stopped when the Tunisian cups his face between his palms.</p><p>“You can have whatever you wish, Nicolò. You are no priest, you are not bound by the laws of any land. Not any longer. You have lived and died countless times. God knows all, yes? Then he knows what is in your heart and still he refuses to let you die. If he hated you, he would not have continued to breathe life into you and Valerio again and again no matter how many times I cut you down. So, Nicolò, what is it you <em>want</em>?”</p>
<hr/><p>Nicolò is a good Catholic. Truly, he is. There was not a Sunday in which he had missed attending church when he was mortal. He had taken the priesthood seriously. He had even been willing to die for God. For Christ’s sake, he doesn’t even <em>swear</em>.</p><p>Yet, despite all that, as he gazes into Yusuf’s eyes, absorbing the impassioned speech the other made, as he reflects on how good it felt when Yusuf had lain a hand upon his dæmon, all he can think is 'God be damned'.</p><p>He surges forward, pressing his lips to Yusuf’s. The other lets out a surprised noise and for a moment Nicolò thinks he has made a mistake but then Yusuf is kissing him back and he melts into it. A great flood of boldness and desire courses through him and he’s pushing Yusuf backwards until the other is pressed against the wall. He deepens the kiss, tongue licking its way into the Tunisian’s mouth, tasting him—Yusuf tastes of rosemary and mulled wine. Nicolò has never kissed before, he’s operating on nothing but sheer instinct and need but it is enough.</p><p>He’s not ready for sex, he knows that full well, but this is nice and it’s progress. Letting go is so liberating and he feels a rush of adrenaline thrum through his body.</p><p>When they finally part, both men panting, Yusuf lets out a quiet chuckle. “You are full of surprises, Nicolò.”</p><p>“I have to keep you on your toes somehow,” he jokes lightly, resting his forehead against the other's, basking in his warmth and the taste of him still on his tongue.</p><p>A different sort of pleasant sensation invades them both then and they glance over to their dæmon’s, who had been forgotten in all this, to see the two nuzzling their faces against one another. The humans meet each other’s gaze and smile.</p><p>Oh yes, this is the beginning of something quite beautiful.</p><p>They move their bedrolls close together and fall asleep wrapped up in each other’s arms. And at the opposite side of the cave there is Valerio and Atheer, snuggled up together as well. There are no more nightmares, only a lovely expanse of nothingness that allows them a proper and full sleep.</p><p>All are content.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Translation of the Italian:<br/>Si avvicina una tempesta = A storm approaches</p><p>Translation of the Arabic:<br/>ʾanā ʾāsef = I'm sorry</p><p>Dæmons introduced in this chapter:<br/>Atheer = Joe's dæmon. African Wild Dog. Male. Name meaning: Light reflected from a sword<br/>Valerio = Nicky's dæmon. Common raven. Male. Name meaning: To flourish/To be strong</p><p>Second shout-out to my fiancee who chose Joe's dæmon in its entirety, including the name.</p><p>Thanks for reading!</p>
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